India Against Humour to launch stir against laughter

The historic Raslila Maidan, a site known for hosting some of ‘Mother of Democracy’s’ most consequential protests, is now preparing for what could be its most important battle yet—the fight against humour. An NGO named India Against Humour (IAH) has announced a mass agitation, demanding an immediate nationwide ban on all forms of comedy that dare to challenge tradition, common sense, or their personal sensibilities.

“Laughter is a Western conspiracy,” declared IAH’s founder, Shri Param Shuddh Bhakt, at a press conference. “Jokes are nothing but intellectual terrorism. Our ancestors never laughed—look at their paintings! We must return to our roots and remain as serious as our stone-carved temples.”

The movement has already found its faces. Leading the agitation is Anshan Hazir, a veteran protester who has vowed to fast indefinitely unless all comedy clubs are turned into yoga centers. “When did we become a country where people laugh at things other than our government schemes?” he lamented. Standing beside him was Anshan Krantiwal, who once led an anti-corruption movement but has now realized that jokes are the bigger threat to national security. “Forget black money, the real danger is black comedy,” he declared, adjusting his muffler.

Can culture survive a joke? India Against Humour says No

The NGO’s 57-point manifesto includes a call to regulate stand-up comedy under the Unlawful Activities Prevention Act (UAPA), mandatory Sanskrit translations for all jokes to ensure cultural sanctity, and a nationwide alert system for ‘Joke Attacks’ on fragile sentiments. “If we don’t stop this now, tomorrow someone will be making fun of the way we peel mangoes!” an activist warned.

To kickstart their campaign, IAH has already filed FIRs against three comedians for “intent to giggle” and “possessing jokes with the potential to cause mild amusement.” They have also sent a legal notice to Tom & Jerry, arguing that the cat’s continued failures could harm India’s global reputation. Meanwhile, TV news channels have declared stand-up comics as ‘Urban Naxals of Laughter’ and are running prime-time debates on whether ‘knock-knock’ jokes are a secret code for a foreign-funded conspiracy.

As Raslila Maidan gears up for this historic movement, sources confirm that an emergency humour task force has been deployed—to arrest anyone caught laughing. Citizens are advised to maintain a solemn expression at all times to avoid suspicion.

Because we are living in the “age of hurt”: It’s no longer a crime to be corrupt—but it’s definitely a crime to be funny.

This is a satirical piece

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